I seem to always be in the middle of other peoples drama. I seem to be what I call “the go to girl.” I was talking to someone close to me today and she stated that I do love drama and seek out other people’s drama. She said I pluck it out and there is a reason. She stated it feeds something in me, like my ego and I need to learn why I like it so much.
Well this upset me and had me thinking and freaking out and i spoke to another friend who disagreed. I have been thinking all day upon those statements and wondering if that is true and why it upset me so much.
Finally I’ve decided no I don’t like drama. And yes I LOVE to help people. I do. And yes in the past it has been unhealthy for me b/c I’ve tried to do and be everything people. I am still in the process of not doing this anymore and it is a growth process for sure. But I am a caregiver person. I love to take care of others b/c seeing them happy and loved brings me joy. For me it is me and I don’t think that is bad. We can’t be so shut off and about us and analzye so much that we don’t love and help when it si needed. It’s like the story in the Bible where all the religious people left the man by the road and then a simple man helped him, paid for his stay in a hotel. The Bible tells us to love others, to care for the weary, broken-hearted, elderly, and widows.
So yes, I listen to my friends. Yes I will take them to the doctor. Cook for them. Stay up all night with them. Take them in and help them in a DV situation. Yes I will and it is the right thing to do. I know it is. I have learned when I should say no. I have learned when people are taking advantage of me. But like my friend said, when someone needs genuine help, you are there. Yes I am here. God’s blessed me to be here and help and love. One of my gifts I believe from God, is my giving and loving nature.
I will cling to it and not deny it or destroy it…for my life would be pretty miserable. I wouldn’t be myself.