Not Without Grace

Life breaks through in all the burdens I feel I bear. All the choices I need  to make, all that I have yet to make. Not knowing what is right or wrong. Wanting to be something I am not and not knowing how to get to that very spot. To see, to be, to dream, to believe, to be.  To exist in grace. The grace of all of this life. For I am nothing without grace. His Grace. The one who died for me. The one who hung on a cross. The one who bled and died.  The one who sought more than this life. The one who saw all that could be and suffered. He was not weak. He dreamed. He believed. He lived and died for you and me. Water and blood poured from his side and that was it, a final good-bye. He breathed his last and in those words he asked for forgiveness– for us. So beautiful and amazing.

I desire that. To live a life not without Grace. To have love and compassion for others. Yet I feel so selfish right now. I feel alone. I think of the pain. I think of the life I do have here and yet I want to leave. To run away. To move on. To start over to have an adventure. Is that so wrong? what is the way? What is right? What is wrong? How will I ever belong? 

Still I wander, searching, seeking and trying to be.

Trying to live a life not without Grace.

12-26-09      9:47 pm


3 thoughts on “Not Without Grace

  1. prsherod55 says:

    God reminds us it is not up to us to make things happen for ourselves.
    You see his repution is on the line not ours.
    It’s his heart ,his passion, his determation to help us on the journey. He will see you through and the holy spirit is with you as you walk in the spirit. Our flesh wants it all right now,,, He will guide you as you journey towards the light …

    • uponmyheart says:

      Thank you again for your words of God…..I really feel He is doing a work in me and maybe that His will is for me here in the small town I so hate at times. I feel more peace about being here and as I have always felt….I believe i am to be the light for my family. I have hit a rough patch but I am getting through now and am feeling being…ah sweet peace…..I can actually breathe… is nice……so thank you again for always giving me God and encouraging me…..I am moving forward into a new year where I think i will learn more than I ever have about myself and my Christ…….

  2. prsherod55 says:

    A song I heard tonight on webstream
    by Laura Hackett

    The battle is raging
    The devil is raging
    I don’t wanna be sleeping
    while the battle is raging…

    The conferance started today and is on till thursday
    check it out it’s so awesome.

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